Friday, June 21, 2024

Wolfe’s Woofer: Overheard


“Good morning,” I said.
“Good morning to you,” said the older tourist.
He and his wife were taking seats at the table in front of me on the deck at seaside restaurant.
“What are you two talking about?” his wife asked, cupping her hand behind her ear.
“He said ‘good morning’ Peggy,” the man said loudly. To me he said, “Please excuse her. She’s hard of hearing.”
“You need to speak up,” she said.
Another older tourist took the table next to them and said, “Good morning.”
“Good morning, sir,” the woman’s husband said. “I’m Rob and this is my wife, Peggy.”
“I’m Cameron. Nice to meet you.”
“What are you talking about, Rob?” his wife asked.
“This is Cameron.”
“Quit wasting time and order our food,” Peggy said.
As we ate at our separate tables Rob’s wife bitched about everything from their flight to Belize to their grandchildren.
“Where are you folks from?” Cameron asked.
“We’re from New Orleans,” Rob said.
Cameron said. “When I was younger, I had a girlfriend from there and she made me think I wanted to always stay away from New Orleans.”
“Why is that?”
“She was the meanest woman I’ve ever met in my life. She nagged at me and bitched at me from morning to night. She seduced my friends and spent my money like water and . . ”
“Rob, what are you two talking about?” his wife interrupted.
Rob said, “This man thinks he knows you.”

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