Wednesday, July 17, 2024

Wolfe’s Woofer: Hearing Aid

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Dennis-Wolfe-Wolfes-Woofers“You need to go get your hearing checked,” Sherry said. “You don’t hear even half of what I say to you.”
“Huh? Just joking, my dear.”
She said, “You’re going to Belize City tomorrow so why not stop in for a hearing examination? You’ve been playing music in front of loud speakers for forty-five years and it must have done some damage to your ears.”
In Belize City the doctor asked, “What seems to be the problem with your hearing, Mr. Wolfe.”
“I don’t really have a problem,” I said. “It’s the people talking to me that have the problem.”
“Oh, I understand,” the doctor said. “Your wife sent you here didn’t she? We get a lot of that.”
“Doc, I can still hear pretty good,” I said. “I just don’t hear great like I used to.”
“I think I’ll fix you up with a hearing aid,” he said.
“How much does a hearing aid cost?’
“Anywhere from $20 to $2,000.”
“What? $2,000 for a hearing aid? What does the $2,000 one do that the $20 can’t do?”
“Oh, you can hear any conversation clearly with the one for $2,000.”
He held another one and said, “This is the $20 one.”
“I don’t think I would like one like that with wires dangling down my neck. How well does it work.”
“Oh, it doesn’t work at all,” the doctor said. “It’s a fake but when people see the wire running down your neck it makes them talk louder.”

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